Me, an Introvert, and a Small Tutoring Class in the Living Room

Tangerang, 08 Juli 2025 - I never thought I'd write this and actually publish it on my blog. But I felt like I needed a place to share my story. Who knows, maybe I'll read it again, and I'll smile to myself because I've been so confused.

So, I'm now in my sixth semester majoring in English Education. For a long time—a really long time—some of my neighbors and relatives have been asking me to open an English tutoring class at home to teach their children. I've heard requests like that countless times.

But I always say, "Later, Ma'am..." or just smile and say, "God willing, Ma'am..." But deep down, I'm hesitant. I'm afraid. Not afraid of the students, but afraid of myself. I'm a very introverted person. I rarely leave the house. When I do, it's only for necessary purposes. I never go to my neighbors' houses or have long conversations. I know them, yes, but only by name.

And honestly, I don't know the kids around my house that well. I often just watched them play, or just said hello when I passed them. Even then, I often just smiled. So when I was asked to teach them, I felt like, "Can I do it? Can I connect well with kids I'm not that close to?"

The problem was that I did teach, but I taught reading, writing, and arithmetic, not private tutoring at home. However, over time, the urge grew stronger. A few weeks ago, a neighbor seriously asked, "When are you going to start tutoring, Miss?" Ugh. I was so confused. On the one hand, it would be awkward to keep refusing. On the other hand, I also thought: If I don't try, how will I know if I can do it?

Finally, I took the plunge. I said, "God willing, I'll start this week, Mom." And it worked. Four days ago, I officially opened an English tutoring class at home. It's a small-scale class. The students are all from my neighbors. The study room is also the living room, which I transformed into a "makeshift classroom."

And it turns out... it's not as easy as I thought.
I thought the important thing was having the materials. It turns out, creating a comfortable learning environment is a real challenge. Especially since I'm a quiet and awkward person, I really have to find ways to not be awkward.

I have to prepare age-appropriate materials, create activities to keep them engaged, and so on. But despite all the hassle, there's a joy I can't deny. It feels like... I'm learning something completely new. Learning to be brave. Learning to believe in my own abilities. Learning to make the kids feel at home learning with me. And most importantly: learning to do it, even when I'm still unsure.

Honestly, I'm still far from being a "cool tutor." My study room is still mediocre. My teaching methods still have a lot to evaluate. But, if I don't start now, I'll never know if I can do it. And it turns out, starting isn't that scary. Despite the difficulties, it still taught me many things I never learned in college.

If you happen to be reading this and have a dream — whether it's opening a tutoring center, starting a business, creating art, or simply trying something new — I have one thing to say: just go for it. Give it a try. Let your doubts flow, but don't let them stop you.

Because I still have doubts, I'm still afraid of making mistakes, but now I'm happy because at least I'm not stuck with the word "later." I'm really trying.

Pray for me that I can continue learning and make this small tutoring even more beneficial. And if you're also looking to start something, I hope you have the courage and I hope it goes smoothly. We're all learning slowly. 🌻✨